How do these people survive?
The following, is an email I received. I couldn't stop laughing. Enjoy!
ONE: Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. 'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter. 'You don't?' I replied. 'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply. 'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?' 'That's right.' So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
TWO: I was checking out at the local Walmart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the 'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?' I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.' She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.
THREE: A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy.'
FOUR: I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?' 'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked... 'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk....' (PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself !!!)
FIVE: Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies. (She was a brunette)
SIX: A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......' Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency!'
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Monday, January 4, 2010
The Annoyance of fat cells
Oh yeah, you know what I'm talking about. The frustrating battle with weight gain. I used to have the ability to consume large amounts of food and not gain a thing. But that all changed once I hit puberty, as it does for most women. We are all aware of the issue and how hard we have to work to overcome it or accept ourselves for who we are.
So what makes us gain? Besides the absence of will power?
1A. Laziness
That's right. Laziness. This can come in many forms. But tv has been the culprit for me. Growing up, I remember how much we used the tv as a babysitter. And I think that's part of my problem. I'm still allowing my tv to babysit me. But this particular issue has another part to it. And that my friend, is eating.
1B. Eating While Watching
Recently I watched a talk show that talked about eating while watching tv, and how this "activity" can actually make you eat more than you normally would. The impulse to bring food to your mouth enables you to ignore your stomach. This is a problem for many people.
Hmmm...well not all of us watch a ridiculous amount of tv. So what else makes us gain?
2. Fast Food
Have you looked at the calorie count, or anything on the list of ingredients and daily nutritional value of the food you buy at restaurants? It's CRAZY! Once you start looking at the content...and compare it to what you can cook at home, you will start to rethink eating out.
3. Cola/Pop
I don't even know why I drink this sometimes. But it's fizzy goodness always finds it's way into my apartment, and into my belly. Just cutting this out of your diet, eliminates a large amount of sugar that your body would just turn into fat.
4. Sugar
Even thought this ingredient makes us feel good while we're consuming it...we all know it will do the opposite in the long run. And it's in practically everything we eat. That's right, you take a look at the labels of the products you buy on a regular basis.
There are more I could add to the list. But you get the idea. All these things in combination, create an obese population with hunger for more. Walking right alongside them are 3 things.
1. A longing to feel good - which leads to the eating of feelings
2. A longing to fit into sizes that shouldn't even be possible - which leads to eating disorders
3. Will power
Each of these are chained to us. Like traveling companions. Number 1 is a bag of cheesecake bites. Number two is anger and resentment. And number 3 is shrinking...almost non-existent ability to say no. The only thing that will strengthen number 3 is number 4.
4. A kick in the ass - administered by your want to accept or change yourself
I've invited number 4 to live with me for the month of January. Hoping it will stay indefinitely.
So what makes us gain? Besides the absence of will power?
1A. Laziness
That's right. Laziness. This can come in many forms. But tv has been the culprit for me. Growing up, I remember how much we used the tv as a babysitter. And I think that's part of my problem. I'm still allowing my tv to babysit me. But this particular issue has another part to it. And that my friend, is eating.
1B. Eating While Watching
Recently I watched a talk show that talked about eating while watching tv, and how this "activity" can actually make you eat more than you normally would. The impulse to bring food to your mouth enables you to ignore your stomach. This is a problem for many people.
Hmmm...well not all of us watch a ridiculous amount of tv. So what else makes us gain?
2. Fast Food
Have you looked at the calorie count, or anything on the list of ingredients and daily nutritional value of the food you buy at restaurants? It's CRAZY! Once you start looking at the content...and compare it to what you can cook at home, you will start to rethink eating out.
3. Cola/Pop
I don't even know why I drink this sometimes. But it's fizzy goodness always finds it's way into my apartment, and into my belly. Just cutting this out of your diet, eliminates a large amount of sugar that your body would just turn into fat.
4. Sugar
Even thought this ingredient makes us feel good while we're consuming it...we all know it will do the opposite in the long run. And it's in practically everything we eat. That's right, you take a look at the labels of the products you buy on a regular basis.
There are more I could add to the list. But you get the idea. All these things in combination, create an obese population with hunger for more. Walking right alongside them are 3 things.
1. A longing to feel good - which leads to the eating of feelings
2. A longing to fit into sizes that shouldn't even be possible - which leads to eating disorders
3. Will power
Each of these are chained to us. Like traveling companions. Number 1 is a bag of cheesecake bites. Number two is anger and resentment. And number 3 is shrinking...almost non-existent ability to say no. The only thing that will strengthen number 3 is number 4.
4. A kick in the ass - administered by your want to accept or change yourself
I've invited number 4 to live with me for the month of January. Hoping it will stay indefinitely.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
