Who would buy these??

Ok, so Sam and I go shopping the other day and as we walk through the mall to get back to the car we saw these. We felt they were stupid enough to deserve a picture. Seriously...why are stores selling things like this?? Who would buy them? Can you imagine the tan lines you'd get from wearing these? Every year people come up with idiotic things like this...you gotta wonder what their mental state is. You'd have to be nuts to spend money on these!

The house I grew up in...

Through the years my Mom's house has become more and more run down. I have plenty of stories about mice, squirrels, mold and more. Don't read the following stories if you have a weak stomach.

Story #1 - Go Nuts For M&M's
I remember a while back when I was about 20. My room was in the basement, so I could hear when the mice were running around upstairs. For a few nights, there was a little more action than normal but I thought nothing of it. I started to noticed pieces of chocolate all around the couch.When I pulled back the cushion I was in shock. There was A LOT of mouse poop! I was so grossed out. It also looked like the mice had played inside the cushions because they were all chewed up in the corners. Lori had left a bag of peanut M&M's on the couch and they had ravaged through it. So I vacuumed it up...it was like vacuuming up a bunch of paper clips. I made a point of telling Lori it was her fault. What are big sisters for?!!

Story #2 - The Cover Up
I was 18, and I had just come home from school for lunch. I decided to relax in front of the tv. Half an hour passes and I start hearing this slapping noise. Like an elastic band hitting the floor. After a few minutes of it, I realized it was coming from the kitchen. So I check it out. MOUSE!!! At this point my body overheats from disgust. When mice eat the poison, they dry up from the inside. It was paralyzed on one side and jumping a little every few seconds. As it did this, it left a trail of blood on the floor and wall. When it stopped jumping, I put a plastic bag on the end of a bent coat hanger and covered it.. It was a nice surprise for my mom to come home to.

Hmmm...I'm thinking this is enough for you to handle for now.

Now to get to my point. Mom made the decision to renovate the house late last year. And it's coming along nicely. Although, the guys doing the renovations aren't the most proffessional...the work they contracted out looks great! The outside of the house is awesome! Siding, roofing, eaves troughs....inside she has new cupboards in the kitchen, a new bathroom, carpeting (It's strange that all that red shag is gone), laminated flooring, a new front door (hence the peephole pic)...Check it out...

Hamilton 2008

I was in Ontario for three weeks. During that time I roller-balded down the beach strip (a paved pathway along Lake Ontario), stained part of a deck, shopped at IKEA and more, picked strawberries, visited a lot of family, went to the drive-in, made good use of a pool and a trampoline, went to two wedding receptions, peeled wallpaper, weeded a garden, went to Canada's Wonderland...I'm sure there's some stuff I've missed.

This is apparently a birth certificate for one of my distant relatives: Way back in the Bahm line, the name was spelled Bohm and Boehm...with two dots over the o. I'm guessing the spelling was changed when they arrived in NewBrunswick.


I think my favorite memory would be roller-blading along the beach strip for three hours eating wild blackberries along the way. We had blue teeth, lips and hands. I realized later, that my feet were also blue. They're very ticklish. so it was difficult to clean off.

Here's a few pics to highlight the fun times

A great gift idea

Looking for the perfect gift is difficult sometimes. Especially if you're low on cash. I ran into that problem recently. My cousin Mike was turning 11 and I didn't want to get him a crappy gift that he wouldn't use. Everything he wanted seemed to be out of my price range too, so I browsed a department store for ideas.

In the stationary section I came across this design your own t-shirt packet. Basically, if you have a color printer, you're set. I can draw and come out with pretty good results, so I decided to draw (on my computer) something he'd like and use them to iron it onto a t-shirt. He really likes Family Guy, so I made him a shirt with Stewie on it. I was so happy to see that he enjoyed it!














I have made quite a few t-shirts for people since then. But now I've gotten to the point where I'd like to make my own designs. The t-shirts I made before were great. But I'd like to design my own characters (instead of using popular cartoon characters). The photo above is my first stab at it...it's designed for my friend Christine who is crazy about frogs.

Camping - Big Whiteshell Lake

It took us 2 1/5 hours to get there. It would have been a little nicer to look at if the trees were in bloom, but it was still good to get away from everyday city life!

The four of us (Joelle, Lori, Shawna and I) were prepared for most things. Except eating. We forgot our paper plates, so we cooked our meals in tin foil and basically ate out of that. Man was it good! Roasted veggies, mushrooms, hamburgers, smokies, soft tacos...and junk food of course. I couldn't find my matches before I left, so we were stuck using a lighter.

Our neighbors on the first night sounded extra "special". Even though there was a Provincial Park ban on alcohol all May long weekend, they had obviously brought some anyways. But it was funny listening to their conversations. They really had a lot of nothing to say. One of them even went swimming. I was surprised! I had stuck my feet in the water and it was like ice! There was no way we would have gone in at all. But when you combine "special" and beer, I guess that's normal.

Last time I went camping (last Aug.) the tent we borrowed was hard to put up and reeked like cow poop and pot. So I eliminated that this time by buying my own. It has a mesh part on the top, which is good for air circulation but also let in a bit of the cold air. Poor Shawna borrowed a sleeping bag from her dad that didn't zip up. So the second night, she used the emergency blanket with the sleeping bag. We just have to remember to bring slippers next time.

To occupy ourselves, we ate a lot of great food, hiked a 40 minute trail, played tennis, watched a couple movies before bed, played cards...the usual camping activities. If the water wasn't so cold still, we could have rented a canoe. Just thinking about the canoe tipping us into that ice cold water was enough for us to decide against that.

How to avoid a Squeegee Kid

Oh yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Those people that stand at busy corners, until the light turns red...then...they attack. Smearing their dirty water all over the windshields of unsuspecting drivers.

If they can stand on the street all day, smoking in their designer clothes and patting their dog complete with a diamond collar...they can go out and get a job and pay taxes just like the rest of us.

Why do people give them money? It's not like you're getting a service you've asked for!!! They run up to your car, smear the window and make it worse than before you washed all the bird crap off the day before. Then, to make matters worse, you feel sorry for them so you pop them a bit of change. Do you not see that this is wrong?? Do you know how much these people make in a day for coating the city's cars in stank water???

Here are a few tips on what to do if you spot one:
1. Roll down your window and say "no speak-a-da engrish".
2. Wave your hands frantically in the air while nodding your head "no" as they walk up.
3. Squirt them with a water gun as you drive by.
4. Rev your engine as they approach your vehicle.
5. Let them clean your window and give them a blank stare.
6. This one's my favorite and I've used it many times: If you spot them in time, stop and leave at least 3 car lengths of space between you and the car stopped in front of you. If they still approach, start backing up. They'll get the hint.

DO NOT give them money or say "I'm sorry, I don't have any change". You don't have to feel bad. Remind yourself that this person needs to learn to get a job and be responsible. Not that people will give you money if it looks like you're being productive. You all know there's a difference between being productive and looking productive!!

Helpful Hints: Missing Manners

Germ Spreader: It seems like someone around me is always sick. Coughing, sneezing…the works. The other day I was on a bus, and this woman was sneezing like her organs wanted to jump out and coughing like she was going to give birth through her head. I tried to move away after the first time she sprayed me, but there was nowhere to go. The bus was jam packed! I daydreamed the rest of my ride that I had a can of Lysol and was dousing her with it. I guess her mother never taught her to cover her mouth.

Swishy Swishy: There's nothing like a sloppy eater that ruins the appetite. You know what I mean. Those lovely people that slop their food around in their mouth like mouth wash. Do they do this to ensure it's been chewed right and is as close to a liquid as possible? Liquid sandwich...YUCK!

Toothpick No-Nos: When normal people use toothpicks, they pick the tooth and that's it. They don't look at what they've just dislodged from between their chompers. They don't suck it back into their mouth. And they most certainly do not use it as an ear scratcher and then place it back in their mouth! I have recently seen this happen...I was disgusted and nauseated on so many levels.

Rethink That Pit Stick: Some people get comfortable with the same products. I know, I’ve done it. But when you have used the same deodorant since 1960, you need to let loose a little! When your sweat mixes with the gunk and you smell worse than you would if you wore none at all…take the hint. Yes it’s you who smells! Yes I burn scented oils when you stink up my surroundings and yes…I hold my breath to prevent from loosing my lunch in your direction.

There's just one more thing that is bugging me lately. It's not a helpful hint. It's more of a concern really. When you live in an apartment, you often notice the hallway smells to high heaven. It's a mixture of food, personal smells and who knows what else. Well, our hallway smells like adult diapers (there's something more toxic about an adult diaper smell than a baby diaper smell), kitty litter, bleach, musty wood, onion and grease. Why? Why do we have to smell this crap? There seems to be nothing you can do to stop it from eeking into your own apartment either! Do not accumulate used diapers, take out your garbage, use your windows to air out your apartment, clean your kitty litter and take a freakin shower!!!!

Ok, I'm done. If you have none of the issues stated above, have a great day. If you have one or more...please correct the problem for the benefit of others or stay at least fifty yards away from me at all times.